Strange visions

Had a dream last night that I was in a cabin on a mountain, during an earthquake. Large red stones tumbled downhill as I too refuge in a doorway, and then thing seemed to slow as an enormous rock slowly moved, end over end, toward the house, with me waiting until the last moment to move out of the way. Possibly closest thing to a nightmare as I get.

Find out this morning that there was an earthquake in Cali. How about that?

I'm not afraid of a panda, I know karate!

That there should've been some last words.

Memory's Garden

There are times when it's not easy to remember that I've got it pretty good. That what I've been asked to let go of this year will not cripple me, and someone else needed it more.

There are times when it's hard to get out of my own head. To remember to do the (art) work because it seems to be the thing that keeps me from splitting my head open on the steering wheel. Blood stays inside. INSIDE.

Damn. I forgot my yogurt today.

What's also difficult to not fucking whine. Because who wants to hear it? I don't really want to put the effort out there to make my shit entertaining or interesting. I just want to be depressed, have a couple beers and a really good hamburger and fries somewhere semi-gloomy. I also want to rewind life to a situation that seemed happy, even if it wasn't entirely.

I thought it was. Then again, what I'm asking for there is self-deceit, and that way lies madness for certain.

I guess that it's good to realize that since happiness comes and goes, enjoy what is there, and don't set up camp in gloomyville.


All that said: I need to start taking some steps. I know, I know.

Kyöpelinvuori

For some reason, I'm glad I learned this today.

City Livin'

Saturday night, I was driving to the store to get meat. I like meat, it's tasty.

Anyway, I'm driving down Division to get to the store, passing by a porn theater. The theater is bland; a forest green everywhere except for the yellow sign with red lettering, telling you it's Oregon's Adult Theater, and then a pair of mirrored doors (think bad '90's highschool van) for accessibility. There are no posters outside, nor anything, really, to give the place personality, and as a result there is a vague sense of creepy about it. (I want to go in and check it out, though.) That Portland still has these anachronistic haunts pleases me to no end. I doubt they will last much longer, but that they're still here in the age of internet and DVD, this makes me smile.

Today, however, I was to get an Icing on the cake moment.

Outside on a white sheet of paper, was printed this announcement:
Bicycle parking indoors.

I love living in this city.